Many years ago, then Australian Prime Minister, Malcom Fraser, said that “Life wasn’t meant to be easy!” He was shouted down by the press and ridiculed on talk back radio.
Sadly though, he was right.
If you contemplate this for a moment you will realise a few things.
We cannot become fit and strong unless we take on the challenge of intense exercise.
We cannot become knowledgeable if we do not dedicate some time to learning new things, often things that we perceive to be difficult to understand.
We find it difficult to remain lean and of an ideal weight if we do not say no to foods that are likely to have a negative impact.
We can never find out how to be happy and content if we do not learn to work our way through unhappiness and disappointment.
And we can never develop robust self-esteem if we never overcome a challenge using our own determination and ingenuity. We do need to navigate our way through struggle to have a win in life.
The cold hard reality is that difficulty brings out the best in us. It forces us to face a situation where we feel inadequate, or perhaps scared, and step into the challenge and solve our problem, so that we may move forward. This builds confidence.
Here are a couple of examples. When I was a little kid, if we wanted custard, my Mum would have to milk a cow, and my dad would have to go find an Emu’s nest and steal a couple of eggs. Then mum would need to cut wood for the stove, light a fire and then make the custard.
Today, all you need to do is go to the supermarket or order it and get home delivery.
A few years later, when I wanted to play with a mate, I had to walk to his house to first see if he was home, then see if he wanted to hang out. He didn’t have a phone. Now, you just send a text or go meet your friend in an online game.
None of this is a bad thing of course. But modern life removes our challenges. And without adequate challenges, there is very little struggle.
Watch a butterfly working its way out of a cocoon. If you interfere, the vital processes that push fluid into the wings may not occur and the butterfly will not form properly and die.
Every human being does need to keep growing. When we stop growing, we begin to decline. Challenges are our growth opportunities. They provide the struggle that requires us to summon our willpower and direct our energy toward achieving something we perhaps didn’t initially believe we could do. Fear of failure is just part of the struggle.
It doesn’t matter who we are, there is always an opportunity to put some challenges into our lives. It could be related to sport or fitness. It could be related to curbing your lifestyle to save money for travel or to purchase something you desire like a car or a house. It could mean going to college to learn what is needed to start a career of choice.
There is irony here though. The current generations of young people were raised by tech savvy parents who went overboard to make things easier for their kids. They interfered with school teachers and sports coaches, kept their kids inside out of fear, and allowed their kids to play victim to difficulty. The consequence is that many young people are waiting for someone to come along and remove their challenges for them. It isn’t going to happen.
You cannot avoid struggle. It will eventually find you. If you live a life eating only the foods you like, always avoiding exercise and never taking on anything difficult, your body, mind and spirit will all be degraded and sooner or later, disease will visit. Then your struggle will begin.
So, I offer you this challenge. Perhaps start by answering these questions.
- Who do I really want to be in this life?
- What can I do to leave my mark in this world? (It doesn’t have to be grand)
- What do I need to learn to get started?
- How do I go about creating a workable plan?
- What is my next step?
It is your life my friend. Go grab it with both hands and squeeze every last drop of glorious adventure from it. You will realise one day what a gift this life really is.
John Toomey
Founder
The Gentlemen’s Alliance
Everything a young man needs to find his way to a good and decent life as a man.